By Adam, Summer Intern at St. James Town
I first learned about Toronto City Mission (TCM) through my church’s downtown campus and their partnership with the organization. I don’t recall knowing much about TCM, but I remember our church giving members the opportunity to volunteer by taking care of and spending time with some kids. Although this was a couple of years ago, I only really started looking into TCM this year.
My decision to work for the organization was very last minute. I had initially applied to serve on an overseas missions trip for the summer with a campus ministry I’m a part of. However, my application was unfortunately rejected because of the history of my mental health from when I was younger. I was frustrated by this and wanted to spend my summer for myself. I no longer wanted to give my summer up to serve God.
A short while later, I had lunch with a friend. The topic of my overseas missions trip came up and I told him how I was feeling. By this time, I had done some reflecting and realized that even though God had closed one door, He was opening another one because He had better plans for me. We were also speaking about what our summer plans were. He mentioned the possibility of becoming an intern for TCM, but wasn’t too sure. As we talked, he gave me more information and I suggested we work together. He let our mutual friend, whom he heard the opportunity from, know and I was sent an online application. As I read the job description, I was immediately hooked. I applied as soon as I could. I ended up getting the job and I was ecstatic! I was really looking forward to this new opportunity.
My excitement came with insecurities too, though. I’m not the loudest person when I talk and I have a hard time being strict even when kids may be misbehaving. I’m also not the best at externalizing my internal emotions through my speech and facial expressions. I often find myself comparing my leadership skills with fellow interns and feel I don’t measure up. The Bible details a similar situation in Moses’ life where he makes excuses to deny his calling from God.
Exodus 4:10 says, "But Moses said to the LORD, 'Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.'”
He points out his speech impediment, which I am similarly doing. In the end, God ended up using him. As I continue to intern at TCM, I just hope and pray that I won't focus on all my flaws, but realize God is able to still use me the way He used Moses.
As my site continues camp, I find that I am able to be patient with the kids, especially those who have gotten hurt by getting into altercations with each other while playing. I also don’t really see many kids having a problem with any of my imperfections. They are more concerned about making relationships and just having a leader to spend time with. As the summer continues, I just hope that I am able to let Christ be evident in my character so that I may be a good role model to the kids.
Adam is a new intern this summer. He is serving at St. James Town and helping the children journey through their relationship with Jesus.